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If only I could just call up Rosalind Wiseman every time I had a question about navigating the shark-filled waters of girl friendships! She knows girls and their stuff.  Thankfully, she wrote a book. (Since she probably won’t move in to become my personal parenting guru I guess that will have to suffice.)

Last week, I drug my daughter to her Girl World Tour here in Denver, Colorado. The tour promoted Wiseman’s new book, Boys, Girls and Other Hazardous Materials – a fictional book incorporating the stories real kids have told her. (P.S. Wiseman asked parents to read it FIRST if you have kids under ten, as it deals with mature issues.)

Here’s what Wiseman shared about WHY kids aren’t telling adults about bullying and all sorts of other stuff. “Their worry is that girls do not think that adults can help them.”

Really?

Really.

“There are kids that have seen adults that some times do not merit their respect,” continued Wiseman. And while schools continue to emphasize respect, Wiseman suggested the word dignity is more helpful.  She suggested parents ask themselves how to behave with dignity so that we can guide our daughters to conduct themselves with dignity.

(*Dignity‘s Latin root means worthy where respect in Latin means to look back at someone’s achievements. Interesting, isn’t it? )

How can I teach my daughter that she has the right to live and be treated with dignity?

Read Wiseman’s other book, the revised Queen Bees and Wannabes.  You’ll find helpful gems to encourage our daughters to tell us stuff such as:

- Accept silence.

- Don’t make fun of their feelings.

- Apologize if YOU, the adult, are wrong.

- Ask if she’s venting or wants advice.

- Sit and listen. (Or as Wiseman said, “Don’t just do something, stand there.“)

I haven’t read the whole book but I will — again and again.  My daughter’s eight. I must be ready!